Punch Drunk Raccoon!

Hello.

When people are intentionally sabotaging food to make domestic and wild animals very sick...

You can't fix stupid!

In Virginia, the Hanover County Animal Resource and Sheriff’s department are nt pleased with the latest discovery. A raccon was found inside a liquor store restroom and it appeared to be highly intoxicated.

That means the animal under some form of influence. They will likely have to euthanized it because it was exposed to things outside its normal omnivore diet.

The animal broke into the store and damaged a few bottles. When the bottles dropped on the ground, the raccoon licked up the fluids because of the sweet aroma.

According to the Hanover County Animal Protection and Shelter, authorities found the "masked bandit" collapsed in the bathroom of the Ashland ABC Store Saturday morning, where the furry burglar had ransacked shelves and drank multiple types of alcohol.

In a social media post, officials said they took the "very intoxicated" raccoon back to the shelter to sober up before releasing him back into the wild.

"After a few hours of sleep and zero signs of injury (other than maybe a hangover and poor life choices), he was safely released back to the wild, hopefully having learned that breaking and entering is not the answer," the Facebook post read.

The Hanover County Animal Protection and Shelter helps rescued animals if they are found in the wild.

Animal control sees an unconscious raccoon inside a restroom.

"The shelter provides veterinarian care for homeless or unwanted animals until they are adopted or placed with an animal rescue organization," the shelter's website reads.

Raccoons can be domesticated. Unfortunately, this raccon is a wild animal and has been exposed to human contact through feeding and unintentional contact with alcohol.

If they let the animal back into the wild, its extent assures a return. They will likely euthanize the animal due to the situation to prevent potential attacks if cornered.

If you find a raccoon inside your home or business, stay calm, secure the area by keeping people and pets away, and try to encourage the raccoon to leave on its own. If it doesn't leave or seems sick, contact a professional wildlife removal service or animal control for assistance. Avoid any direct contact with the animal, as they can carry diseases and become aggressive when they feel threatened. 

They will hiss at you and could bite if you proceed with contact with them. 

They are able to turn doorknobs, enter into small cracks, walls, floorboards and woodsheds. They eat primarily small insects, rodents, chickens, cats and spiders. They also eat berries, carrots and tomatoes. They are accustomed to human food.

Some raccoons carry could rabies and it could be extremely dangerous for them, pets or humans to have carriage of the disease.

Cover trash cans. If possible wash your tables and cans with soap and bleach to deter raccoons.

The raccoon caused modest damage inside Ashland, VA liquor store.

Can we get the Darwin Award for the most stupidest people on the planet?

You can't fix stupid!

You can't change minds!

You are completely trapped in stupid.

You are wrapped and emboldened in stupid.

Again, why do white people always treat wild animals like they're domesticated? 

I don't get why some of these people believe it's their mission to disrupt the lives of others. 

This is why Republicans are idiots. Democrats are idiots too but at least some of them have the sense to not engage in stupidity. Not saying all Republicans are idiots, but definitely the ones who voted for President Donald J. Trump are.

I've said it before and I stand by what I say: "Wild animals are......well you know!"

Interacting with uncontacted people is dangerous. Well, they are.... you know!"

If you want to be a thrill seeker, you might want to get life insurance.

Bonus: A Cleveland, Ohio woman was arrested after Springfield Township Police discover a raccoon was playing with her meth pipe during a traffic stop. It happened in May 2025 and made international headlines. The suspect is innocent until proven guilty in a court of law.